Dating and relationship questions
Are you thinking you want to be in a long-term relationship with him?If so, you may be wondering when to have "the talk" with him.): Compatible values are essential in developing a healthy relationship. If you’re ready to have sex after date ten and your date is waiting for an “I love you” first — or maybe even marriage — things will get awkward if these physical-relationship expectations aren’t outlined before one of you rejects the other. Can you see yourself becoming friends with them, too?Discuss faith systems, both those from childhood and any current beliefs. As awkward as these conversations may be, negotiate appropriate boundaries early on. If you and your significant other are not spending every night together, how do you each spend those nights apart?
It can be hard to assess how someone deals with conflict until you’ve had your first fight, but discussing previous conflicts and their subsequent resolutions can help you both understand how each of you deals with arguments. You don’t need to disclose financial details early on in a relationship, but be aware of how you both approach payday, splurges and saving for a rainy day. Can you become your partner’s greatest cheerleader and champion? Is parenthood, financial success, creative pursuits or travel on the wish list?
If someone was securely attached to their primary caregiver, they’re more likely to have a secure attachment style now (i.e., they’re not too needy or too distant). What are some examples of when you’ve persisted and succeeded at a long term goal? Is your pot smoking/binge drinking just a being young thing for you or can you imagine wanting to do it your whole life? Rationale: When you fight, is s/he going to fight nice?
Rationale: Attachment style shows a degree of continuity from childhood to adulthood. Are you able to admit when you’ve made a mistake or when your own actions might’ve contributed to a problem?
Family, both immediate and extended, play an important role in who we’ve been and who we are.
Some relationships can’t withstand differing views on physical contact, so discuss this early and often. What hobby or side project keeps her up late at night? Can you support these passions and projects and get excited for them? Don’t just meet friends in a large group setting; intentionally get to know your date’s best pals. While introverts and extroverts can definitely make it work, being honest about your social life — how often you go out, how late you party, how many quiet nights in you crave — can help you both navigate busy, merging schedules. If you need to be doing something project-based or social to feel invigorated, share that. Does he aspire to living well below his means, giving most of his income away to charity?